…That I am an empath?
Raise your hand if you know what an empath is.
For those of you who haven’t raised their hands: An empath is a person who has an acute or highly developed sense of empathy. Empathy is a paranormal or psychic ability to sense the emotions of others. It is distinguished from telepathy, which allows one to perceive thoughts as well. Occasionally empaths are also able to project their own emotions, or to affect the emotions of others. Although I do not believe that I am the latter… I know very well that i am the former.
So why the re-emergence into the blog with a topic such as this?
The last month of my life has been non-stop. Most every month is like this within my current working position. It is a busy place and many of us work scores of projects and all manner of hours to make sure that every need is met throughout the world. When I arrived back from Europe in mid-April it was an immediate gear shift into the preparations of a large work event, which, landed full-fledged by May 25th. For weeks there were 12-hour days and lost weekends. Stress was part of the daily diet and Mercury was in retrograde to boot.
When times become that “intense” my motor skills will fly higher within. Stress is natural in my make-up… but when a perfectionist such as myself finds himself in a position of overwhelm with a job that is filled to the brim with potential failure there is nothing short of a heart attack awaiting.
This past working period was particularly hard on absolutely everyone because there was (is) the second layer of stress added in other aspects within the make-up of the business. In any sort of financial structure change comes a lot of posturing for position. There is every reason to believe (no matter what they may say) that there will be jobs going away and as such there are certain more political types who are making sure they are perceived as vital and necessary within the company. Some are. Some are trying that much extra to suddenly be…
As a result tensions and moods were all over the map and through this I was picking up each and every emotion like a sponge. This, on top of every other aspect of the stress induced circus-like event we were running through had me turning slightly wacko and prone to sudden bursts of emotional release once in the safety of my own home. It can be said that it is slightly odd what has spurred some of these outbursts. Unexplainable. But they are an amazing release of the stresses (boys and girls there are many OTHER ways that are good for you to release stress as well! Perhaps one day I will speak to those here on “What If I Told You…”)
Being an empath is not like being a super-hero. I wish. It is more something that I find myself having to be careful of. Look at it this way: before I got sober I hung out with people that I could easily call my “lower companions”. Although this is not a statement or judgment on them… it is what it is because I would absorb what they were while amongst them. In sobriety I would find myself absorbing different things. I once had a co-worker that hated the job she was in so much that she would only berate it and the people within it while we conversed. As a result of spending time with her I would find myself deeply agitated and angry with the place that employed me. The problem was I did not actually feel that way… I just became that as a result of the empath “powers.” The solution was that I had to avoid spending too much time with her. Contrary to that I have found that if I am around people who are positive souls my true nature is very easily revealed. That is who I am from the core but as an empath I can find myself in other personalities much like a chameleon. It isn’t as though I am trying to impress or agree to gain favor… it is actually a genuine act of empathy for those I am around.
My name is Mark and I am an empath. Some day I will find the proper way to use this sort of ability or burden and gain access to a better world as a result. In the meantime… they say that awareness is the most powerful means to solution.
Before I go I leave you with a few short thoughts on the world around me within the last few months of my absence in this blog:
Four weeks in Europe was amazing… even with all the airports and meetings
Adam Lambert most definitely should have won American Idol.
I turned 51. Whoa.
I hit 18 years of sobriety. (that calls for a drink!!)
I can only shake my head and know that there is a huge fight ahead here in California to have equal rights for marriage. (more on that to come!)
For now I bid adieu.
Be Happy. Be Well. Just Be.