Recently it dawned on me that I have a tendency to ask for signs. That, I would expect, is somewhat normal in prayer. Part of my experience is in looking for answers and in the constant lesson about surrender and trust. The plain truth for me is that sometimes I find myself wanting life to move a bit faster than it may be. Sometimes I might have the tendency to think too much on a subject, person, thing… and find myself asking God to show me what I “should do” or to provide me a sign to point me in a direction.

Then I wait.

The human irony involved here is that although my intentions are good, my motives are still selfish. Whether consciously or subconsciously I may be asking for God’s will but in the end I am looking for mine. I have become aware that I am undoubtedly missing the very signs I have Ben asking for simply because they did not fit the picture of my desire or expectation.

How did I come by this revelation? My life (thankfully) is filled with lightbulb moments. I call them my page-turns in life’s book. Some are more significant than others but the moments are all transitional. My current awareness was offered in two layers. First came the piece of surrender in a very longstanding work drama. How many times must a certain issue be repeated before even the more insane amongst us are able to recognize the repetitive nature of the “dilemma”? Once surrendered I looked at the person presenting me the problem and proclaimed my surrender. I would no longer take an active role in it’s perpetuation. I felt the peace and trust one experiences when they have turned the result over to God.

It was then, as the problem was being presented that I noticed I was being offered a sign that I had completely ignored before. Perhaps I had not considered it because it seemed to be something that I would not want to happen, but wouldn’t that be a scenario built in my control? If I am to trust God in surrender of the results I do not want to limit myself to seeing the answers he provides me. The key is in an open mind.

Completely open.

Ask yourself if you are truly willing to receive the answer when you are seeking guidance. It is with that willingness that your own concept of surrender will change, grow and flourish. If you truly want a sign you will see it for what it is meant to be. Trust that answer and you are trusting God.

What a difference it has already made for me.

Be Happy. Be Well. Be.

There are people in the world that do not embrace change. It is a challenge and a roadblock to a pattern that provides comfort and shelter. I am not one of these people, as much as it seems some may think.

… and I’m fine with that because I can only continue to do my best out there in the world and within myself. But there lies the rub… because there is a world out there that is not always going to understand, see, or even care that this is the case. I get that, and again because I have learned that others reactions to me is more about themselves, I accept.

The fact remains that we are given pivotal signs in our paths that provide us with the clues, information or outright knock over the head that there is something that can or should be done. With most, that does not mean the sign will be heeded. For many it will not even be seen. For weeks now I have seen things that have been screaming at levels that are hard to ignore. I examine, I consider and I wonder and weigh the possibility of such signs. What do they mean? What could they mean? What do I want them to be about?

Some would tell you that the first thought is the correct one. The trick is to know what that first thought was before the mind over-analyzes everything that follows. Fortunately I am well aware of what my instincts are saying and it is strangely becoming more realistic and less scary to consider the leap that should and will be made.

I love change. I have shifted my very existence on at least five different parts of my life. I have altered my life to the point of referring to myself in past tense… as if two separate human beings were being discussed. I have altered jobs by firing myself and trusting the experience would guide me towards a different and more enlightening chapter (which has always been the case.) I have moved in complete sweeps of all that I know. I have experienced deaths that have shifted my very core as a living soul on a planet that will never fully give you what you expect.

One of those shifts is upon me. I am not complete with the decision of timing … or if the decision will be mine at all. But it is in my sights. I have seen the signs and have read them correctly. I am excited. Because although some may not see it… I love change because it keeps me on my toes.

Bring it on. I’m ready. I am not sure that I could be any more ready.

Be Happy. Be Well. Be.